He Doesn't Love You Like I Do
by tristyn1234567
Summary: Just a brainstorm. I might not finish this, so don't hold your breath.
1. Chapter 1

**This starts off at the end of episode 22 of season 7. **

"Well," Emma paused, looking down at her husband that stood next to her. "A happy beginning then."

Regina narrowed her eyes at the woman clad in pink and softly smiled. "I would like to call it a second chance." The Queen turned away from the woman that felt so much for and walked back to her place in front of Snow and David. SHe turned back to the crowd and cleared her throat.

She watched as Henry handed Hop back to her mother. Her eyes landed on Emma's soft smile that Regina had only ever seen her give her daughter and their son. Her heart filled with pride, but once she saw Hook's hand land it's way on her shoulder, her heart sank a bit. Nonetheless, she carried on.

"I thought my story came to an end a long time ago. And then new people came into my life." Her eyes met Emma's and it took everything in her not to visibly shiver. "People who gave me a second chance. I can't wait to see what's in store for me next, well, for everyone. I refuse to believe there won't be more adventures."

Memories from Neverland and Camelot and the first curse raced through her mind as if they had only happened yesterday and not years before. In almost every single one of those memories, though, whether they were good or bad, Emma Swan was there by her side.

"More love." She thought of Robin Hood, and every True Love's kiss that she had known about or witnessed.

"More family. And yes, there will be more loss." Robin, Graham, Daniel, Hook's brother whose name she couldn't remember, her mother and father, Neal.

"I guess that's just a part of life. And in the end we can get past it all with hope."

Regina did not know what she was expecting when she was finished talking, but what she saw made her heart feel like it was splitting into a million pieces.

Emma leaned into Hook, her arms still holding their well-tempered baby, while Hook rested his head on Emma's own. They looked so happy, happier than they had in awhile, and the thought broke her heart.

The crowd around her broke out in applause as she stood at the podium, and before she knew it, she was being rushed out of that room and into another by the older version of her son where there were tables lined around a makeshift dance floor.

"The fact that you people can combine the Enchanted Forest customs with this world's customs still amazes me," she teased at her son. Henry only chuckled and walked her over to the throne that sat at the front of the room, made specially for her by Gepetto. She made a mental not to thank him later.

"Are you okay mom?" Regina nodded her head easily and plastered a smile on her face that could fool nearly anyone, but not her son. Henry raised an eyebrow at her and sighed.

"Mom you can't lie to me. What is it? Today is supposed to be a good day." Regina sighed and closed her eyes, willing the tears that were threatening to fill her eyes to stay away and never make themselves known again.

"Henry, I do not want to talk about it now. So drop it, please," she practically begged. The young man nodded.

"Whatever you want, but I hope you know you can talk to me, even if it is about Ma."

Regina's eyes shot open again, but Henry was already on the other side of the room and slipping out of the large wooden door.

"Damnnit, Regina. Get ahold of yourself," she scolded, rubbing her hand over her face.

She didn't have much time to herself before people started to pour into the room and fill up the tables. As she sat in her chair at the front of the room she was able to see practically everything that was going on, but she was only looking for one person in particular.

When her probing eyes finally found her blonde mane of curly hair, her breath tightened in her throat. Hook had his left arm around her while they sat in their seats, their back to Regina. She couldn't help but find the way his hook dug into her arm a little strange, but she pushed the thought away for another time.

But when she saw him physically press his hook into her arm harder, she sat up in her seat. Without even looking at him, Regina summoned an assistant over to her throne.

"Go tell Miss Swan that I need to speak with her, please." The young boy looked at her with a confused look.

"I beg your pardon, my Queen, but I am not aware of a Miss Swan." Then Regina remembered that to anyone new in town, she was known as Emma Jones. The thought made her throat burn.

"Sorry. Tell Mrs Jones that I need to speak to her urgently." The boy nodded and quickly made his way through the crowd of party-goers. Regina watched him the as he went, and when he leaned forward and told Emma what he was supposed to, she held her breath.

Emma looked over her shoulder to Regina and whispered something to the boy before she turned back to her husband. Regina's heart sank for the third time that day. She stared at Emma's back for what felt like forever, but she was broken from her trance by the assistant tapping her shoulder and bowing in front of her.

"Mrs Jones said that she cannot speak at the moment, but she said to meet her in your office once the party is over." The boy spoke in a rushed, whispered tone, as if this was the biggest secret he'd ever had to tell.

"That's fine. Thank you." And with that the boy was gone and Regina was left alone to stew in her own thoughts.

The party couldn't have ended fast enough. By the time it was over it was well into the night and Regina had seen Emma for at least an hour. She put on a smile and talked to the people that congratulated her and such, acting almost disgustingly happy.

When Snow finally announced that they would be wrapping up this festivity Regina sighed from relief. She said her goodbyes to those who said them to her and even then some, but the part that she wasn't looking forward to was the long talks with Snow and David and both Henries once everyone else was gone.

But Snow and David didn't stick around much longer than everyone else. Her youngest Henry left with his grandparents, but her eldest Henry stayed back after his own family had headed home.

"You know you can't hide from me forever." Regina sighed and hit her hands on the ever-tightening corset that she had been in for far too long. She turned back to her son.

"I can and I will. I have things to do, Henry." It wasn't a lie. She did have things to do, and she didn't want to keep Emma waiting in her office longer than she had to. She had probably already been there for a while.

"Does this have anything to do with Mom hiding out in your office for the past fifteen minutes, nursing on a bottle of apple cider?" Shit. That was the only word that ran through her head. SHit shit shit shit shit shit.

"I can't say I know what you are talking about," she lied, jutting her chin into the air as if that could prove her case. Henry scoffed.

"You don't have to lie to me, Mom. And besides, anything that happens, I am going to know. If I think about it before bed I am just going to end up writing how it goes while I am asleep anyways." Regina's brow creased and she moved her head back as if she was hit with a gust of air.

"You still do that?" She almost didn't recognize her voice. It sounded weak and unsure and she hated it. Henry nodded and walked over to her, putting both his hands on her shoulders.

"Don't try and change the subject. I know you want to ignore whatever this is between you and Mom, if there even is anything, but you can't. I am not saying that you have to tell me anything, if you don't want to, you don't have to say anything at all, but don't keep lying to yourself."

Regina smiled softly and reached up, cupping her son's face in her warm hand. "When did you get so smart," she whispered, running her thumb over his high cheekbone that he clearly got from his mother. The man shrugged.

"The worlds may never know." With a kiss to her forehead and a promise to call her tomorrow, Henry left her alone once again.

The walked to her office felt like it took hours but it really only took a few minutes. She felt the need to knock when she got to the familiar door. She stood outside the piece of wood and took a deep breath, her hands clasped in front of her.

Finally, after saying screw it and jumping from the balls of her feet once or twice, she pushed open the door.

Emma Swan sat with her back to the door, but Regina could easily see the half empty bottle of cider in her hand and the way her shoulders rose and fell sharply.

"Emma," she tried, walking around the couch and perching on the cushion next to her. Emma was staring at the fire, her eyes glazed over. She held the bottle tighter than Regina thought necessary, her knuckles turning white around the crystal.

"Do you remember the night we met?" Regina was taken back by the question, but she nodded her head anyways.

"Of course. How could I forget?" She said the words with a slight chuckle, her fingers picking at her immaculately made dress.

"You said, and I quote 'How would you like some of the best apple cider you've ever tasted.' And I asked if you had anything stronger, but this shit is pretty strong, Regina." She lifted up the bottle and pointed it at Regina and then brought it back down again.

"Trust me, I know. It has been my only friend on many nights," Regina admitted. She finally looked up, her eyes falling on Emma's face.

The flickering fire before them casted shadows across Emma's face, showing just how structured it really was. Her cheekbones were higher than she remembered them being, and her jawline was more prominent than she ever thought it was.

"Are you okay, Emma?" The blonde chuckled and rested back against the couch.

"Define okay," she mumbled into the lip of the drink. She leaned back the crystal container and let the drink flow effortlessly down her throat. Regina sighed.

"How are you and the handless wonder?" Emma chuckled around her mouthful.

"We're True Loves," she sighed, setting the glass down on her thigh.

"That isn't what I asked, Emma." Emma sighed and leaned forward, setting the drink on the table and pushing it far away from her. She leaned back against the couch and sighed.

"We are fine. Same old, same old." Regina frowned.

"Just fine? You are married and have a baby, she should be having the time of your life." Emma scoffed.

"Please don't start with that. This is real life, not some Disney movie. No matter what people choose to believe, this is still the same shitty world, with the same shitty people and the same shitty problems," she rambled, her eyes prickling with tears.

Regina own heart ached for her. She didn't want Emma to even know what hurt feels like, but she knew she couldn't help that.

"You do know that you can talk to me, right? I know we have had our problems in the past, but I have been told that I am a good listener." Emma chuckled at that, but when her eyes met Regina's her laughter was gone and her face went stone cold.

"I don't think I want to talk to anyone about this," she whispered, her body sinking down into the fluffy couch. She pulled her knees up to her chest, her pink dress draped over her knees, and rested her chin on them.

"You mean the way Hook digs his hook into your arm any time he wants to et your attention or wants to keep you under your thumb?"

Emma went rigid. "You can't possibly know anything about that or me or him or what goes on in our lives." While Regina knew Emma's was trying to be stern, the younger woman's emotions betrayed her. Her eyes filled with tears and her jaw quivered.

"I don't know your situation, no, but I do know what it is like to be in a certain situation that you don't necessarily want or need to be in," she explained gently.

She watched Emma go from barely holding on to not holding on to anything at all in less than a second.

A vicious sob fell from her body and a fat tear rolled down her cheek. Her hands clutched at her forearms, her knuckles turning white around her already pale skin.

Regina did the only thing she knew how to do and pulled Emma's body closer to hers and wrapped her arms around her shaking body. One move would send Emma sitting in her lap, curled up into a ball.

"It will all be okay, Emma," she whispered, stroking the back of her head as she cried into her chest.

"I don't know what to do, Regina," she cried, her sobs mixing in with her words. Regina held her tighter, pulled her closer, and rested her cheek on her head.

"You don't need to talk right now, Emma," she whispered, drawing circles on her back.

Eventually, Emma's cries calmed down and before she knew it, she fell asleep in Regina's arms. Regina continued to hold her and rub her back. When she finally knew she was asleep after half an hour of holding her, she pressed a soft kiss to the crown of her head.

"He doesn't love you like I do," she whispered, even though she knew Emma would never hear it.


	2. Chapter 2

**As of right now, I don't have a beta so any mistakes you find are strictly my own. **

Regina and Emma didn't speak of that night. Emma was at the Mayoral Mansion now more than ever, as was Regina. While Hook was out at the docks or doing whatever it was that he did, Emma was with Regina, Henry, and baby Hope at the house that Emma had started to consider home.

"Where is he tonight?" Regina stabbed a piece of broccoli with her fork and shoved the piece into her mouth. Emma did the same, but much more violently and way faster than Regina did.

"The docks. maybe?" Emma mumbled around the piece of broccoli. Henry scoffed, his shaggy hair swaying and his baby face slightly redder than normal.

"Is there something wrong with that, Henry," Regina questioned, setting her fork down beside her plate. Emma swallowed her food and sighed.

"I just think it is bullshit."

Both Emma and Regina stared back at their son with wide eyes and open mouths. In her spare arm Emma held Hope who was sleeping soundly despite the near chaos around her.

"You did _not _just say what I think you said," Regina threatened. The vein in her forehead was protruding and Emma could practically feel the anger radiating off of her.

"I did, Mom. I am eighteen. I don't think this is such a big deal what I say."

"It is a big deal when you say it in front of your mothers and your sister, Henry," she growled back. Emma sat up straighter when she heard the tone of her voice.

"Look, maybe this is a conversation for another time, but Henry what are you talking about." She felt Hope shift in her arms and she instantly looked down, bouncing her up and down and fixing the blanket that was wrapped around her.

"All I am saying is that he has done a crappy job of trying to make you feel wanted. I mean, how many times does he see you and Hope? How many times does he tell you what he is doing and where he is going? It is all just a load of bullshit," he growled out, stabbing a piece of chicken as he rambled.

Regina sighed again. "I don't exactly agree with you using that word, Henry, but I do agree with him, Emma," she admitted quietly.

"I don't understand how any of this is relevant at this very moment," Emma sighed out, trying to avoid the subject as much as possible. It always gave her a headache when she thought about it too hard.

"You don't ever want to talk about it, Mom. You always change the subject. I don't understand it," her son sighed out. He shoved the piece of chicken in his mouth and chewed it violently.

"Henry, if your mother doesn't want to talk about it then she doesn't have to. End of discussion." Henry finally shut his mouth and kept stabbing at his broccoli, but Emma sat and bounced her daughter in her arms. Finally, when she couldn't take the awkward silence anymore, she stood up.

"Hope needs to be fed. I will be in the living room," she mumbled before pushing her chair back in under the table and darting off to the living room as quick as she could.

She made her way over to the couch and pulled down her loose fitting shirt, letting her daughter latch on like she had so many times before. She left out a sigh and leaned her head back against the couch. Her arms gently bounced Hope and she closed her eyes, willing the tears that threatened to spill to go away.

"Emma," Regina called from the doorway, rapping her knuckles against the wooden frame.

The blonde sat her head up quickly and grabbed the blanket that was draped across the back of the couch and pulled it over her exposed breast. "Yeah?"

The older woman walked into the room once she knew Emma was covered and walked around the couch. She sat down on the cushion farthest away from her and clasped her hands in her lap.

"I'm sorry if Henry made you feel uncomfortable. I am not sure of what has gotten into him." Emma only laughed gently and then let out a sigh.

"Its fine. I would be upset if I were him, too," she whispers, brushing a piece of hair away from Hope's forehead under the blanket. She felt the baby move around in her arms but only held her tighter against her chest.

"Yes, but he doesn't have to act the way he did, to bring up the things he did and hasn't done. I know that must have hurt," she hummed, trying to let the words come from her head and not just her heart.

The dull ache between her ribs made it feel like her heart was beating too fast and too hard but not fast enough nor hard enough. Her palms were sweaty and just being this close to her while Emma was sitting there exposed under the blanket made her feel woozy.

She wanted to slap herself. She shouldn't be thinking like that when Emma was just trying to feed her child. She choked back a groan and looked down at her lap.

"I like to think I am pretty indestructible by now," Emma mumbled, leaning back against the couch again. Regina followed suit and leaned back, relaxing her nearly perfect posture.

"We like to think that nothing can touch us because of the horrible shit we have been through, Emma, but we aren't indestructible," she explained, letting her eyes roam over Emma's scrunched up face. Henry made the look from time to time when he was confused or trying to figure something out. It made her heart swell.

Regina's words hit her straight in the gut and Emma thought that she couldn't breath for a second. Her eyes were squeezed tight and she clutched onto her daughter as if she were the last thing tying her down to this world.

"I know," she breathed out. "I know." She didn't want to be vulnerable. She didn't want to hurt and cry and be upset over a stupid man who convinced her she was in love enough to marry him and have a child with him.

"Miss Swan, I-"

Regina was cut off with a snort that fell from Emma's mouth.

"I haven't heard you call me that in years, Regina," she laughed out the words, and if Regina didn't know any better, she would have thought that she was actually enjoying herself.

But she knew she wasn't. She knew Emma was hurting inside and wanted to hide behind a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. Regina smiled back at her though and went along with it, deciding to ignore the way she slipped up and called her by her maiden name.

"Sorry," she mumbled instead, blushing down her neck.

"It is perfectly okay. I miss you calling me that," she admitted softly. Under the blanket, Hope shifted and turned her little body in Emma's arms, pulling the blanket down further, barely covering her exposed breast. Hope cried out and Emma quickly pulled her shirt back up and turned Hope around, laying her on her shoulder.

Regina watched everything in front of her with wide eyes and with red tinged cheeks. It was so odd seeing Emma mothering a baby, to see her taking care of her child. For a split second she thought of what their own child might look like and what Emma might look like while taking care of her or him.

Then she realized that she just sounded crazy and anyone who might be able to read thoughts would have her committed to a mental institution.

"I guess I will have to get back in the habit again," Regina hummed. Emma nodded and gently patted Hope's back until a small burp fell from her tiny lips. Both the woman chuckled. "I am sure she gets that from her mother."

"She did learn from the best," Emma teased. "Do you want to hold her?"

Regina went rigid. She'd never asked to hold Hope, but that didn't mean she didn't want to. Any time she was around the baby alone, whether Emma had left her in her carrier when she had just got to the house and sat her down on the couch beside Regina or she was laying in her bassinet that Regina had bought for her house, Regina always wanted to hold the small baby.

"Sure," she squeaked out. She sat up and held her arms out to Emma. When the blonde was sure that she was safely in Regina's arm, she collapsed back onto the couch with a grunt.

Usually Regina would reprimand her at the action, but she was too enthralled by the baby's bright blue-green eyes.

She looked like her mother and no one else. She was completely her mother's daughter, from the way she scrunched up her nose when she was moved to the way her thin lips were slightly turned down at the corners. It was like seeing another version of Emma.

"Regina." By the tone of her voice, Regina could tell it wasn't the first time Emma had called her name. She looked up with glossy eyes and hummed a what.

"I called your name like four times. You were like in a trance." Emma's body was stretched out on the couch, her arms folded behind her head, which made the loose grey shirt she wore ride up her stomach, showing a sliver of skin.

"I, uh, sorry. She just looks so much like you." She almost didn't recognize her own voice. It was breathy and squeaky and she felt like if she talked any louder her lungs would expose.

How one small piece of skin showing could affect her the way it had scared her.

_You need to get ahold of yourself, Regina. You are making a fool out of yourself. She is married for Christ's sake. _

"Hook was pissed about that. He said that he had no proof that she was his daughter since she looked so much like me," Emma chuckled her way through the sentence, but the words sent fire raging through Regina's body.

"Reason number six thousand and seventy-one why he is a dumbass," she mumbled under her breath, fully meaning for it to go unnoticed by Emma, but the blonde heard it. She only sighed and closed her eyes, and for the millionth time that day, willed the tears to go away.

"He is my husband, though, and I am supposed to love him no matter what." Regina scoffed and shifted the small child in her arms, tucking her against her chest and in the crook of her left arm.

"You are supposed to love your husband, yes, but Emma do you really love him."

The biggest question of them all was now out in the open and Regina felt her heart stop as soon as the words left her lips. Emma kept her eyes squeezed shut, but behind her head her hands started shaking and her eyes filled with tears behind her lids.

"You don't get to ask me questions like that, Regina," she finally squeaked out, a tear slipping from her shut eyes. It rolled slowly down her cheek and fell to the couch, which didn't go missed by Regina.

The older woman instantly felt horrible about what she had so impulsively spewed out. Her heart was in her stomach and she felt like she couldn't breath. She never wanted to hurt Emma, she never wanted to be the reason for her tears.

"You're right. I am sorry, Emma. That is none of my business," she whispered finally.

Emma didn't say anything, she only kept her eyes shut and her hands behind her head. When Regina finally gave up on resolving their conflict through words, she reached over for the remote, mindful on the sleeping baby in her arms, and turned on the television.

She scrolled lazily through the channels that her carrier had to offer, and finally settled on a random movie that sounded only slightly interesting.

"He is my True Love, so yes I love him, Regina," Emma finally said. The brunette jumped at her voice and for a split second she was scared that the Hope was going to wake up with an unrelenting cry. But she didn't, and Regina let out a small sigh of relief.

She wanted to tell Emma to leave him. She wanted to tell her to look at what was right in front of her. She wanted to tell her to stop being so stupid and see that there was someone right in front of her that could love and cherish her more than he ever could.

"I guess if you want to believe that, then be my guest," she said instead. The words felt disgusting coming from her mouth, and she knew that they did not come out the right way because Emma finally sat up and stared at her with a deep frown on her lips.

"Why do you do that?" Regina's forehead creased at the questions.

"I am not sure I know what you are talking about."

"You say things like that and leave shit out in the open until I am left scrambling for answers to what you are actually saying. It is infuriating," she huffed out, her face turning slightly pink.

"Well I am glad to see that you have expanded your vocabulary." Regina tried to get out of the conversation with a joke because she really didn't know how to answer any of Emma's questions.

Emma raised a pointed brow at her and scoffed. "Seriously, Regina?"

"Emma, I don't know what you want me to say. If I say one thing, I would be lying. If I say another thing, you would get upset. Neither of us win in this situation." She didn't realize it but she was subconsciously bouncing Hope in her arm and her other hand was holding on to the baby's smaller one that had made its way out of the blanket.

"Tell me the truth, Regina. You are the only person I have to talk to. You are my only friend."

Regina had ripped out many hearts in her lifetime. Had crushed many in her hand, had watched the way the beating muscle turned in to ash in her own palm. She had crushed many hearts and watched the red light dwindle into nothing. She watched the light drain away from her victim's eyes, had watched the way their bodies crippled to the ground, lifeless and cold.

Thats how Regina felt in that very moment. Lifeless and cold and like Emma had just had her heart in her hand and she crushed it.

_Friend. Just a friend. _

"Emma, I don't think now is the time for this discussion. It is getting late and you have work in the morning and Hope needs to be put down for bed." She shifted Hope around in her arms gently and handed her back to Emma as she talked.

"Regina, no I want you to-"

"Miss Swan. I have to be at the office early in the morning tomorrow and I am sure your husband is waiting on you at your house." She could hear the way she was talking. She was talking like she was the Mayor and as if Emma was some stupid shop owner that wouldn't leave her the hell alone.

Emma's face fell. "You're right. Killian is probably waiting on me," she all but whimpered out. She stood quickly from the couch and walked out of the room without another word to the other woman. The last thing Regina heard was the door slam behind Emma's retreating form.


	3. Chapter 3

Emma sat at her desk with her head in her hands, her thoughts crashing through her head like waves on the shoreline.

Regina had shut down and shut her out so easily. She didn't understand it. Had it been something she said? Had it been something she had done? She let her head fall through her hands and bang on the wooden desk beneath her.

"I am glad to see that our tax payer's dollars are hard at work." Emma didn't hear the familiar clicking of her heels against the marble floors like she usually did. Maybe she concussed herself by hitting her head on the desk too hard.

Emma pulled herself up from the desk and looked at the immaculately dressed woman standing in the doorway of the sheriff's station. She was dressed in red, the color that she looked best in, because it was her power color of course.

"Madam Mayor," Emma said as a greeting, but it didn't have the desired tone. Regina walked further into the large room and stopped by her desk.

"Sheriff Swan," she said back with the same amount of effort as Emma had. The blonde leaned back in her chair and rested one hand on her thigh and the other on her desk.

"Is there a reason why you are here, or are you here to distract me from my paperwork so you can complain that it isn't done later?" Regina hummed and looked down at her own clasped hands.

"As much as I do enjoy bickering with you, Mrs Jones, I do have better things to do with my time now." The name hit Emma in the chest and sent sparks shooting down her veins. Her fingers prickled. Maybe it was pride, maybe it was anger. She didn't know.

"Then, once again, why are you here?"

"Henry has requested your presence tonight at dinner and I expect you to be there." She said the words so simply that Emma would have thought that she hadn't kicked her out of her house so abruptly the night before.

"And does _Henry _really want me there?" Regina visibly flinched and her forehead creased.

"As a matter of fact, Mrs Jones, he was _quite_ persistent on you being there." Emma knew she caught on to her own words, or rather how she spoke her son's name. Her hand on her thigh turned into a fist. Her eyes met Regina's and for a split second she thought she saw something other than the cold stare that she was left seeing until the early hours of the morning. Sincerity, maybe?

But it was gone now, and back was the stone-faced Mayor that she had known so well from her first years in Storybrooke. That all seemed like a distant memory now.

"Well I just like to know if I am welcomed somewhere before I go there and then get kicked out out of the blue." Emma raised a challenging eyebrow at the queen and she felt a corner of her mouth tug up in a defiant smirk.

Regina's chest rose and fell slowly and her nostrils slightly flared.

"Miss Jones, it is a simple yes or no answer. Yes you will be at dinner, no you won't be at dinner. I just need something to tell the manchild that has been blowing up my phone since breakfast this morning," she bit back, her posture stiffening. Emma suppressed a laugh.

"Sure. Consider me there. You don't mind if I bring my husband and daughter along with me, do you? I know Killian has been wanting to see the kid for a while now." Emma knew that inviting Killian over herself would get under Regina's skin, and she wasn't let down when Regina's face went red and heaved up and down quicker than before.

"You want him over just so he can scratch up my mahogany tables? I don't think so, Miss Jones. My furniture is far too expensive for his unnecessary weapon. How does he even hold his child with that thing." If Emma was going to try and get under her skin, she would challenge her right back, she decided. It was what she was best at, after all.

"Oh, we baby proof it. And he only needs one hand to hold Hope. He does have another hand that is also good at… other things, you know." Emma was leaning forward in her chair now, her right hand resting on her desk now, her finger thumping against the desk in an uncoordinated rhythm. Regina looked down at them, and then her eyes trailed up Emma's body like they had done many more times than she liked to admit.

"Oh, I am sure he finds good use for it Mrs Jones. I does only take one hand to hold a full bottle of rum." She put both of her hands on the edge of the desk and leaned forward, the teardrop hole of her dress right in the center of her dress exposing a delicious strip of skin and just a peek of cleavage. Emma gulped.

"You still haven't answered my question."

"You haven't answered mine, either."

"Well mine is important."

"I asked first, Mrs Jones. Now please, if you would, tell me if you and your dinghy pirate are going to be showing up on my doorstep or not tonight. I would rather be prepared for more than just the desired guests." Emma sighed through her nose.

"We will be there. Now will you please get out of my office before I throw your ass out?" Emma growled back, turning her head back down to the short stack of papers in front of her. SHe started thumbing through them, but heard a scoff from above her.

"Is there a problem, Regina? Or are you just wasting my time so you can yell at me later because I didn't finish all this useless paperwork?"

"I would honestly like to see you try and throw me out on my ass, Mrs Jones," she scoffed out, crossing her arms over her chest. Emma raised an eyebrow.

"Don't test me right now, Regina. You couldn't handle it," she said simply, looking down at her paperwork on her desk, looking at it with far more interest that she possessed.

"You're all bark and no bite, Emma." The older woman turned to the door and when she started walking was when Emma stood up with a smirk on her face.

Regina's heels were clicking on the marble floor but Emma's boots made no noise, which made it that much easier to walk up behind the former mayor.

"Hey, Regina?" Emma called from behind her. The queen stopped walked and huffed out a breath.

"What, Swa-"

She was cut off by a gush of air rushing from her lungs as she was hoisted over the blonde's shoulder, face down and ass high in the air.

"Emma what the hell do you think you are doing!" She screeched, hitting the Sheriff's back with the palm of her hand. "Put me down this instant!"

Regina's words had no effect on Emma, though. She only started walking and suppressed a chuckle when she felt how light Regina actually was. She didn't know what she was expecting, but she felt like she was carrying a twelve year old over her shoulder.

"Oh, just throwing you out on your ass," she teased, and as if on cue, her eyes darted to the right and were met by the swell of Regina's behind that was barely covered by the red fabric. She bit her lip and looked back forwards and kept walking, her mind wondering to all the things that she should never be thinking about.

"You wouldn't dare," the smaller woman growled.

"O, but wouldn't I?"

"Emma I swear if you throw me I will make your life a living hell," she threatened, but her voice had succumbed to more of a squeak, the usual threatening tone gone. One of her hands had gripped Emma's hip now, her fingers digging into the deep blue turtleneck that she wore so she could keep herself stable.

"I don't think you are in the position to be making threats right now, _Miss Mills_." The name rolled off Emma's tongue and Regina couldn't help but shiver.

"You are so dead when I get down, Emma Swan."

But Regina really didn't want to be put down. Her thighs were squeezed and every time Emma took a long stride her legs rubbed together, forcing the dull ache that had made its home between her legs that much worse. It didn't held that one of Emma's hands was clasped just where her dress ended and the other right under that, her fingers digging into her thighs.

For once, she thanked her perfectionist mindset that had told her to shave that morning, and she couldn't tell herself that she hadn't enjoyed the view that was right in front of her face as she hung over the blonde's shoulder.

"I think you are the one with all of the bark and no bite here, Regina," Emma chuckled out, pushing the door open with one hand while still holding Regina tightly with the other. When the cool air of the early fall months hit the backs of the queen's exposed thighs she let out a groan.

"Emma please put me down. What if someone sees?" She pleaded, hitting her back again. Emma chuckled a throaty laugh, sending another wave of chills through Regina's body.

"Trust me, Regina. Nobody gives a shit." And with that, the blonde bent over and set Regina's feet on the hard concrete. Regina still had her grip on Emma's hip, though, even when her feet had safely hit the ground.

"You can let go of me now, Regina. I am not going to throw you on the ground or anything," Emma said softly, her skin burning underneath Regina's hand despite the chilly breeze. Almost too quickly, Regina pushed herself away from Emma's body and glared at her, fixing her hair in the process.

"You are an insufferable ass, Emma," she growled, wiping her hands down the front of her dress, even though it was perfectly ironed still and not a speck of dust had landed on it.

"Yeah, but you love me for it," Emma said sheepishly. She gave Regina a bright smile that could have moved the moon and Regina froze, her hands stilling on her stomach. Her posture went rigid, her shoulders shooting back, her jaw setting into a hard line.

"Yes, well, you can be quite charming at times, Mrs Jones." Emma grimaced at the name, but let the words sink into her heart and under her skin, allowing it to fill her with warmth. She gave the queen a bright smile and crossed her arms over her chest.

"If I am not mistaken, I would say that is a compliment, my Queen." Emma purred out the name, her voice wrapping around every word as they danced and embedded their way into Regina's brain. The brunette shifted her weight from foot to foot, the throbbing coming from between her thighs becoming almost unbearable.

"You should take them where you can get them, Emma. They won't be coming very often," she teased, running a hand through her hair before she turned away from the Sheriff and made her way to her car that wasn't ten feet away.

"I'll see you later, Regina," Emma said with a smile, her eyes raking over Regina's backside as she walked, the familiar sway of her hips sending shivers down Emma's spine. Regina only unlocked her car door and opened it, threw her purse into the passenger seat before she turned to the younger woman.

"See you," she practically whispered, her breath leaving her lungs entirely. The way Emma looked in that very moment knocked the breath out of her completely. She felt like someone had punched her in the gut with a fist full of love and she wanted to say that she hated the feeling.

Deep inside, though, she knew she loved it and that scared her more than any curse or any demon coming to threaten her town.


	4. Chapter 4

Over the next few weeks, Killian was gone more often than not and Emma was at the palace or at the mansion almost every night.

On days that Regina had off or had very little to do in the office, she would watch Hope instead of Emma sending her to Ashley's daycare. Regina would hold her all throughout the day, and to say that she had grown attached to the blonde haired little girl was an understatement.

"Hey, Moms?" Henry called from the entryway to the living room. The two women were watching a movie. The blonde was sprawled out with her legs thrown over Regina's lap with Hope stretched out of her chest. One of Regina's hands was splayed over Emma's calf and was drawing small circles over the muscle.

Emma sat up, propping herself up on one elbow and held Hope with the other while she looked at her first born. Regina turned around also, her dress riding further up her thigh.

"What's up, kid?" Henry walked into the room, quite nervously, Regina noticed, and sat down on the chair opposite the couch. He wrung his hands in his lap, and looked down at them.

"I know Mom and I have talked about it before, but it got kind of overshadowed by what has happened recently," he choked out, looking up at his two mothers. They watched him with worried eyes and the circles that Regina was drawing on Emma's calves stopped.

"Henry whatever this is you can talk to us about it," Regina said softly. Henry smiled at her and nodded.

"I know. I just know how much you like having me close by and I know this is sort of a tough thing to talk about." Emma's heart dropped. He little boy was leaving her. He wanted to go places, to see the world, to get away from their town that had gotten so big.

"You want to leave," Regina squeaked out, her hand gripping Emma's calf as if if she were to let go she would fly away.

"I want to go to college, Mom. I want to get a degree in writing. I want people to read what I have to say." Emma nodded and looked to Regina who was staring back at her.

"Where were you thinking about going?" Emma's voice was calmer than she thought it was going to be. She felt her daughter wriggle around on top of her, so she held her tighter and kissed her head.

"Well, before school was let out, in February, I think, I applied to NYU. I got the acceptance letter in the mail in May." Emma was beaming with pride, her smile wide and brighter than Regina had ever seen.

"You applied and got accepted?" Regina whispered, her eyes glossing over as she watched her son twitch nervously in his chair.

"Yeah, Mom. A few days later you got crowned as the Good Queen and since then I just haven't found the right time," he mumbled.

"And you really want to go to New York? That is where you want to go?" Regina was sitting straight up now, her hands gripping onto Emma's claves tighter now.

"I really do, Mom. They have a wonderful creative writing program, and it is still close enough for when I want to come down for Christmas or Thanksgiving I can," he explained. Regina sighed.

"You would think that since I have had to do this once already it would be easier," Regina whispered into her hands that were now cupped over her face. Emma was sat up fully now and had Hope held in her left arm while the other was wrapped around Regina's shoulders. "I love you Henry, and I only want the best for you. New York is almost eight hours away. That is so far, Henry."

"I know, Mom. I know. But I want to see what life is like outside of Storybrooke or Camelo or Boston or the Enchanted Forest. I want to meet someone. I want to live my life like a normal guy." Regina nodded vigorously.

"No, of course. I get that. Whatever you want to do we can do." Her voice got softer as the sentence went on. "I just don't want my little prince to go anywhere."

The name hit hard in Regina's and Henry's chest. The name even made Emma want to feel emotional, but she knew that the only reason she even knew what that phrase meant was because of the memories that Regina had given her.

"I am not going to be gone forever. I am just going to be a few hours away. You can call and text whenever you want, and I will visit you as often as I can," he explained. He moved forward quickly, falling to his knees on the carpet and all but crawled over to his mothers. He grabbed one of Emma's hands and then held Regina's in the other.

"I know you don't want me to go. I know this is hard for the both of you. I would just like to have a life outside of Storybrooke. I want to be known as just Henry Mills. Not the Savior's son, not the Good Queen's son. Just Henry." Regina nodded her head, as did Emma. Emma tightened her hand on Henry's and raised it to her mouth, pressing a kiss to his knuckles.

"You know we are okay with anything you want to do in life, Hen. You know we just want what is best for you, and if that is New York, then we will get you there anyway we can," she whispered, rubbing her thumb over the back of his hand. Beside her, Regina nodded and rubbed her free hand over Emma's calves, sending shivers through the blonde's body.

"Anything we can do to make you happy, we are going to do," Regina chimed in. Before she started talking again, she took a visibly deep breath and gave him a tight smile. "Henry, I am your mom. I am never going to be okay when you are away from me. You have been my little boy from the beginning, and I will always see you as just that, no matter how old you get."

Regina didn't know she was crying until there was a tear rolling down her cheek. Emma wanted to reach out and wrap an arm around her, to hug her with everything she had, but she knew she couldn't.

Henry, though, reached up and brushed the tear off her cheek with the pad of his thumb.

"I know, and I love you both with every ounce of my heart, but this is just something I want and need to do." Emma and Regina both nodded.

"We love you, too, Henry. More than you know," Emma soothed, while Regina nodded at her side.

"We always will," Regina added, and before they knew it, Henry was kissing them on their head and bounding back up the stairs to his room.

I took Henry less than two weeks to find an apartment in New York and have all of his stuff moved out, and a week after that he was gone. Late nights with a familiar glass of cider or whisky had become a regular to the two women that had grown fond of each other.

Emma stayed at the mansion almost on a regular basis now, as did Hope. The child even had her own roo, of sorts. Regina had bought a crib and a bassinet for by the bed for when Emma would work late and Regina volunteered to watch her.

"You know, I am starting to think she likes you more than she likes me," Emma teased as she walked through the front door of the large white house. Regina was stirring something that smelled heavenly in a pot with a sleeping Hope cradled in her free arm.

"Oh, she is just sleepy. She's had a busy day today," Regina cooed, bouncing the baby in her arms before she sat down the spoon she had been holding in her other hand.

Emma sat her keys and phone down on the kitchen island and made her way around the slab of marble where Regina was standing with her daughter in her hands. When she stood in front of the older woman she reached out a brushed a tuft of blonde hair away from the baby's pudgy face.

"What did you two do today?" Emma's words were soft as she gazed down at the child that she loved so wholly.

"Oh, we just sat through a few meetings, had Granny's for lunch, and came back home and took a nap." Regina wore a true, genuine smile that stretched her cheeks to the max. The corners of her eyes were scrunched up and her lips were stretched thin.

Emma looked up at Regina, and sure enough, she looked like she had just woken up from a nap. Her usually perfect hair was messy and the makeup she always had on her face was practically gone. Her legs were clad in long black tights and she wore a loose fitting t shirt that hung off her body like a curtain.

"Sounds like quite the eventful day. Much more eventful than mine, at least," Emma joked, her teeth digging into her bottom lip when she watched Regina raise a brow at her comment.

"You mean you didn't eat a copious amount of bear claws and skim through paperwork like you usually do?"

"The donut shop was closed," Emma snapped back in a teasing tone, raising her own manicured brow at the queen.

"Oh, what a shame, then," Regina teased, looking up at the other woman from beneath her eyelashes. "It's so sad that you couldn't scarf down an endless amount of donuts until you feel so full that you have to unbutton your pants and lay back in you chair like a neanderthal."

"Hey, I know when you walk into my office without notice you enjoy seeing me in my natural habitat, Regina, and don't even try to deny it." Regina rolled her eyes and took a small, almost threatening, step towards Emma. Her hot breath brushed against the higher planes of Emma's face, causing the younger woman to shiver.

"Your natural habitat, Miss Swan? Trust me, you are here every night, I am quite used to seeing you with a full belly, sprawled out on my couch."

Before Emma could answer, her phone was screaming at her from across the room where she had thrown it on the counter with her keys. The incessant buzzing made it vibrate across the counter, and if Emma hadn't known any better, she would have thought it would have ran to her so she would pick it up.

"You better get that," Regina whispered, stepping away from the blonde and walking back over to the stove. Hope shifted in her arms, and Regina so fluidly moved her so she cold rest her head on her shoulder that Emma would have thought that it was second nature to her.

Emma sighed and walked over to the island and picked up the phone, her face scrunching up when she saw her husband's name light up the screen. She reluctantly picked up the phone and slid the answer button to the right. She held up the phone to her ear.

"Hello?" She squeaked out. On the other end of the line she heard rustling and shuffling, and she maybe even heard a giggle far off in the background. A lump formed in the back of her throat but she swallowed it down and leaned against the counter.

"Swan?" He slurred into the phone. The shuffling behind him continued, but Emma chose to ignore it, forcing herself not to think of what he could really be doing when they weren't face to face.

"Yes, Killian?" A groan filled her ears, and she didn't know why it made sweat bead on the back of her neck.

"Where are you? Where is my daughter?" His words were slurred, and Emma knew he had wasted the day away drinking at the Rabbit Hole or somewhere else where he could find a cheap drink.

"I am at Regina's right now and Hope is with me. Why? Where are you?"

"I don't have to tell you everywhere I go, Emma. And why do you have to always be over there anyways?" He spit into the phone angrily.

Emma sighed, already put out by the conversation, and ran her hand over her practically makeup-less face and rested her head on her hand.

"Killian, I'm not going to answer any of your questions if you don't answer mine," she sighed out. She heard something slam on the other side of the line, causing her first reaction to be a jump. "The hell was that Killian?"

"Damnitt, Swan, stop asking so many bloody questions and just answer mine. Could you do something right for once and just be the good fucking wife you need to be? You know what, nevermind. I want you home in thirty minutes or I swear to all things above, Swan, you will regret ever coming to this shitty little town," he screamed into the phone, and before Emma could even get a breath out the line went dead.

Emma sat in silence, staring down at the shiny marble that reflected the light. Tears filled her eyes once, then dried back up, but when she felt Regina wrap her hand around her bicep she lost it completely.

Without a moment's hesitation Regina pulled Emma into her arms and held her close as humanly possible to her comforting body. When she saw Emma's face pale and then heard her go silent she instantly went and sat Hope down in her swing, turning it on so the baby would be happy while her mother was anything but.

"Shhh, calm down Emma," she whispered, rubbing her back in small circles. She didn't know what Killian said, she didn't know what bullshit she spewed into her friend's ear, but she knew that Emma wasn't one to cry over nothing.

Emma heaved into her chest, her hands fisting in the back of Regina's shirt. She knew that she was probably leaving mascara stains on the woman's shirt, but right then she didn't care. She just needed someone to hold her and be there for her, and that person was Regina.

Killian had never hit her. He had never so much has laid a finger on her in a wrong way, or their daughter. Sometimes, though, he would get in her face and yell, but she just knew that was something that everyone did from time to time. She was just used to it by now.

"What did he say, Emma?" Regina whispered, her head slightly turning to bury her face in Emma's nearly straightened curles. The younger woman sniffled into Regina's shoulder and sighed.

"There was noises in the back and he wouldn't… he wouldn't answer my questions and then he started shouting and then it sounded like he broke something or hit something." She didn't finish the rest of what she wanted to say because she didn't know how to. She didn't know how to tell Regina that he had threatened her in the worst way possible.

"Is there anything else?" She said softly, rubbing small circles on her back. A shiver racked through Emma's body.

_You can trust her, Emma. _

_You can't, Emma, you can't trust everyone that you meet. You have been hurt too many times. She is just going to hurt you like the rest. _

All of her thoughts were racing through her mind and she just wished they would stop or wished she could have a switch to turn them off. She wished she could just turn everything off for an hour of the day and forget who she was and where she was and forget the standards she had to uphold herself to.

"He just," she paused, "he said that if I wasn't home in half an hour that he would make me regret ever coming to Storybrooke," she whimpered out, her eyes filling with tears again.

Pure rage shot through Regina's body as Emma's words rang through her ears.

_That fucking pig. I'll kiss that son of a bitch. I am going to kill that imbecile. How dare he talk to my Emma like that. _

_She isn't yours, Regina. She never had been and she never will be. She doesn't want you. _

"Emma has he ever hit you?" The blonde shook her head quickly on her shoulder, her blonde hair tickling Regina's chin. The brunette let out a sigh of relief and held her tighter.

"He has never hit you or Hope of done anything, correct?" Emma sighed,

"He had never laid a threatening hand on either of us. Sometimes he yells and maybe gets too close, but he had never laid a hand on me or Hope, I promise. I wouldn't let him do that," she vowed, resting her chin on Regina's shoulder.

After a few more minutes of just holding her, Regina pulled away from her and dripped onto her shoulders. She had to slightly look up at her without her heels on, and a part of her wanted to reach up and wipe away the tear tracks from her cheeks.

"Emma, I don't want you going back to that house while he is there," she admitted. Emma closed her eyes and sighed.

"If I don't then he might come here and I don't know how much he has drank or what he has done or who he has been with. I would rather keep him far away from you. I don't want you getting dragged into this more than you already are."

Regina shook her head and reached up, running her thumb across the high plane of Emma's tear soaked cheek. She gave her a gentle smile and brushed her thumb over her cheek one last time.

"I don't care what you say, Emma. I will always be here no matter what. If he comes here then I will light his ass on fire. God only knows how many times I have been three seconds away from doing it before."

Emma only looked down and closed her eyes, her chest rising as she took in a deep breath.

"Look, just stay for dinner. If he shows up, then he shows up and we can deal with that. I just don't want you getting hurt, Emma. Please just stay here for tonight. It isn't like you haven't been here overnight before." Before Regina had even finished her sentence Emma was nodding, her eyes darting over to the baby that was growing fussy in her seat.

Regina watched as the woman picked her child up and held her close to her cest, cradling her head and pressing soft kisses to her forehead. Her heart continued to break for the woman. Was it because she couldn't be with her in the way she wanted to be, or becuase she was obviously being treated horribly by the person that was supposed to love her until their last breaths?


	5. Chapter 5

After Regina and Emma finished their dinner they were sat on the couch watching a movie that had been on when the queen pressed the power button on the remote. By the time the movie was halfway the movie was through Emma's eyes were drooping closed and her head was gravitating towards Regina's shoulder.

"We should head up to bed, Emma," she whispered, cupping the blonde's cheek to wake her up. Regina's own voice was scratchier than usual from pure exhaustion and the sound of her deep tone sent shivers running down Emma's spine. Emma leaned into Regina's hand and sighed, her eyes still closed.

"Sleep is pointless when you don't sleep anyways," Emma grumbled, leaning back against the couch cushion. Regina felt her brow crease as confusion clouded her face.

"I'm afraid you've lost me, dear." Emma sighed aloud.

"I haven't been sleeping. The nightmares are back," she mumbled, her lips barely moving as she told her secret that she vowed she wouldn't tell anyone.

"And these nightmares, what are they about?" Regina didn't want to pry, but she wanted to know how to help this drowning woman. She knew what it felt like to be trapped by her own mind and that was not something she wanted this woman to go through again.

"Mostly from when I was a kid. Sometimes more recent things come into play. Just depends on what had happened the day before," she explained, keeping her eyes shut. The more she thought about it though, on many nights she had fallen asleep right here, right next to Regina, but not a single dream played its way through her head. Everytime she would leave or go up to the spare bedroom, however, was a different story. Her nightmares clawed their way to the surface and forced her to relieve horrific memories that she only wanted to forget.

"And you don't think you will be getting any sleep tonight?" It was such a simple question, but to Emma it was loaded. No, she wouldn't be getting any sleep because of the things _husband _spewed into her ear not three hours earlier. No, she wouldn't be getting any sleep because she didn't have Regina holding her or running her finger through her hair or rubbing her back like when she did when they were on the couch.

"Probably not," she whispered, finally sitting up and opening her eyes. Regina watched her move, the seemingly permanent frown etched into the corners of her lips.

"Stay here," Regina blurted before she could stop herself. The words just tumbled from her lips before she knew to stop them.

Emma's eyes slowly met Regina's. They stared at each other for long, drawn out seconds before Emma finally looked away.

"I can't help but feel like I have thrown my problems into your life without you asking me to," she admitted, lacing her finger together and then unlacing them, repeating that process over and over again.

"So long as you are by my side and I am by yours, your problems will be mine, Emma." She said her name so softly and the gentleness in her voice made Emma want to cry. It made her stomach flip and turn in a good way and her heart to pick up pace. She smiled down at her sweating hands.

"I can't ask you to do that for me," she all but whispered. Regina, without even thinking, reached out and grabbed one of Emma's hands and laced their fingers together.

"I know you aren't accustomed to people being there for you, and to be honest, neither am I, but we both have to get used to it. I am here for you no matter what. You and that happy-go-lucky baby upstairs are my family, and I think you know that I would quite literally do anything for my family, Emma. I would like to think that you would do the same for me if need be." Emma was staring straight at Regina now. Brown eyes met green and Emma couldn't force herself to tear her eyes away from the brown pools with stars dancing inside them.

"Of course I would do anything for you, Regina," she whimpered out, her eyes filling with tears. She swore that the hand that Regina was holding was pulsing with magic. Pulsing with something that made her entire body feel light and airy, but made her muscles feel like there was magic thrumming through them.

"Thank you. That truly means a lot to me, Emma. You do look like you need some sleep, though. Do you want to go upstairs?" One sick, twisted part of Regina wanted to offer her own bed to the blonde woman. She wanted to have Emma beside her, but then the more realistic thoughts crossed across her mind.

_She is married, you perv._

_She has a child, two actually, one of which is in that room right now. _

_She wouldn't sleep with you. She doesn't want you. _

She let out a small sigh and forced the thoughts away as quickly as they came.

Emma nodded hesitantly and stood on shaky legs. Regina stood also, never letting go of the blonde's shaking hand. Without a word Regina lead Emma upstairs, up the stairs and down the dark hallway until they were standing in front of the room that Emma had stayed in many times before.

"Will you be okay?" Regina whispered, her eyes roaming over Emma's pale face. The blonde nodded slowly, but it didn't convince Regina one bit.

"I will be okay. You are sure you don't want me to sleep with Hope in my room? I don't want her waking you up at three when she gets hungry," she said softly, her voice barely above a whimper. Without hesitation Regina rubbed her thumb over the back of Emma's hand in small circles.

"I swear it is fine, Emma. When Henry was her age he would wake up at midnight and the four, sometimes in between those two times on a bad night. Just try and get some sleep." Emma nodded, and as Regina went to walk away Emma didn't let go of her hand. The queen stopped walking and turned back to the Sheriff.

Before Emma could convince herself that it was a horrible idea, she swallowed her pride and opened her mouth.

"Can I sleep with you tonight?" Regina's stomach erupted into a million butterflies as the blonde said the words, and a small smile stretched her lips. Emma, on the other hand, was a ball of nervous jitters. She sounded like a petulant child asking to sleep in Regina's room.

"Of course you can, Emma," Regina said calmly, pulling the blonde down the hall towards her room. Emma followed her without hesitation, and when Regina pushed open the white door to her room she sucked in one last breath of air before she walked into the elaborate space.

She had never been in this room before. She was sure that she had at least walked into every other room of the house except this one. The curtains were white and thick, drawn across the windows to block any offending light coming in through the window. The walls were a soft cream color, and behind the obscenely large bed was a detailed wall behind it. On the wall farthest from her there were two doors, one to the closet and the other to the bathroom, Emma guessed.

"Holy shit, Regina," Emma all but gasped. She didn't know what she was expecting when she thought of the Mayor's bedroom, but it wasn't anything this light. She had expected greys and whites and reds. Not creams and, well, Emma didn't really know how to describe this.

"If you open your mouth any farther it is going to hit the floor, Ms Swan," the older woman teased. She opened the door the farthest to the right and switched on the light, revealing it to be her massive closet that was filled with priceless outfits, no doubt.

Emma stood beside the bed awkwardly and waited for Regina to return. She didn't want to touch anything. Everything looked so expensive and special that she was nervous that one tiny little touch would send it shattering into a million pieces. At the foot of the bed, Emma found comfort in seeing her daughter swaddled up in her blanket and resting peacefully in her bassinet. She gently reached down and picked her up and cradled her in her arms.

"I hope you know how much your mommy loves you," she whispered to the child, One finger reached up and brushed against one chubby cheek, causing Hope to pucker her rosy-pink lips up at her mother. Emma chuckled and kissed her forehead before turning and looking back to where Regina was.

"What are you doing in there, Regina?" The woman of question popped her head from around the frame of the door.

"What?" She said, quite breathless. Her hair was a mess around her head from rummaging through drawers that hadn't been opened in some time.

"What are you doing," Emma questioned again. The queen stood up with an older, grey colored tank top, and in her other hand dangled a pair of red and black plaid short. Emma's eyebrows shot up as she watched the queen saunter back into the room and place the night clothes on the bed.

"For you," she said simply, pointing down to the clothes on the bed. "I know my silk nightgowns aren't really your style so I dug this out so you would be more comfortable." Emma had to hold out a laugh at the thought that the queen actually had her choice of clothing in her closet at one point.

"Thank you," were the words that fell from her lips, though. She shifted her daughter to one arm before she reached out and picked up the two articles of clothing.

"Here, I will take her while you change. I would like to tell her goodnight before we put her down again," Regina said softly, her voice barely above a whisper. Her eyes gleamed when she looked down at Emma's child, and if Emma wasn't mistaken, then she would call that look love.

"Yeah, of course." When Hope was securely in Regina's arms Emma stood from the bed and made her way to the bathroom. She undressed quickly, folding her jeans and then she sweater that she had been wearing. She decided to completely discard her bra, knowing Regina probably wouldn't mind, and pulled the tank top and shorts over her body.

"-and your mommy and I fought, oh did we fight. We even got into a fist fight one time in front of my father's grave site. But we always had one thing that kept us sane, and that kept us tolerating each other even when we didn't want to: your brother, Henry. He is the one that brought us all together, he is the reason why you are here. He is the reason that we are the family that we are."

There was something about the way that Regina said that they were family, something about the way that Regina was telling her daughter _their_ story, that made Emma's inside go wild and her legs turn to mush. She leaned against the doorframe and crosses her arms over her chest, watching the woman and baby interact so seamlessly.

Regina was holding Hope up in her lap with one arm, while the other had Hope's tiny hand wrapped around her pointer finger. Regina's back was to the door, but over her shoulder, Emma could see Hope's bright green eyes glimmer in the moonlight.

"As the years went by, your mom and I went on many adventures together. After maybe about two or three years of knowing your mother, your brother got kidnapped and take to Neverland by Peter Pan. Your two grandparents, Emma and I, and your father, all went to Neverland to save him. That is when I realized I was in love with you mother."

Emma felt as if the air had been sucked out of the room in its entirety. Her heart sped up a million beats per second and her palms broke out in a cold sweat.

Years of lingering glances and confusing looks and double meanings finally came back to her, hitting her like a tidal wave, nearly knocking her back away from the door frame that was holding her up.

Years of repressed feelings came bubbling back up to the surface, and she wanted to walk over to her and tell her she felt the same. She wanted to scream it at her, to yell it as loud as she could. But she knew she couldn't. She had her daughter to think of and her husband, no matter how shitty he may be. She was not a cheater.

"I realized how she would do anything for anyone she cared about. I realized how strong she really was, and I just stopped fighting it finally. I let the feelings consume me, but when I saw her with you father maybe a day later, I knew she would never want someone as broken and battered as me. So I let her story run its course, and eventually, I learned to live my life without her so deeply invested in it," the brunette explained.

"You love me," Emma squeaked out against her better judgement. She just couldn't stop the words as they fell from her mouth, and she didn't realize that tears were prickling at the corners of her eyes.

Regina jumped higher than she meant to when Emma's voice broke her from her thoughts. Her heart dropped from the top floor of a skyscraper and smashed on the ground into a trillion little pieces when she turned and found Emma in the doorway with tears in her eyes.

"Emma-" she squeaked out but stopped herself. Ema closed her eyes and sighed, her stomach twisting into knots.

"You love me," she whispered again, needing to hear Regina say it one more time before she could even think of believing it. Regina stood from the bed and laid Hope back in her bed for the night and turned towards Emma. Swallowing her pride, she nodded her head and sighed.

"Yes," she said simpy. She tried to sound confident, but she heard the tremor in just that one word. Emma shivered despite the warm room.

"And you have known for, what, five years and didn't say anything?"

"I didn't know how to tell you. You had Hook and I didn't want to get in the way. I was just letting you do your own thing," she tried to explain, but she knew it didn't sound as convincing as she wanted it to.

Emma reached up and rubbed her hand down her face, signing into her palm before she blinked and looked back up to Regina. The usually confident looking woman seemed to have shrunken into herself. She seemed smaller than Emma had ever seen her and it made the blonde woman feel sick. She shouldn't be making this woman feel this way; she didn't want to make her feel this way.

"You could have told me, Regina. I am sure you would have been surprised to see what my reaction would have been." Emma saw Regina's throat bob up and down and her hands curling and then uncurling by her side. Her bottom lip was trapped between her teeth and her eyes were filled with worry.

"And what would that have been," Regina finally said, her voice wavering. Emma sighed and pushed herself off the frame before taking step after step that it took to be standing right in front of the now shorter woman.

"I would have told you that I feel the same way, that I love you, too." Regina let out a shaky breath, while Emma was completely holding all oxygen hostage in her lungs.

"And now? What is are you going to say now?"

"I am surprised that you kept this from me for half a decade. I am surprised I never noticed before, and I am slightly angry that I had to find out by eavesdropping on you telling my daughter our story," she said honestly. The way she ended the sentence, though, made it sound like she wanted to say something more. Of course Regina caught on.

"And?"

"And I think I love you too," she breathed out, her hand reaching out and grabbing ahold of Regina's hand. The older woman sucked in a breath and looked up at Emma with tears in her eyes.

"Emma," she trailed off, but before she could say another thing Emma's lips were pressed against Regina's. Their lips were soft against each other's, Regina's feeling like delicious pillows that Emma could so easily get addicted to.

_Fuck Hook. He cheats on me nearly every weekend. I can have this. This is what I want. I want her, not him. I am in love with _her.

Emma reached up and cupped Regina's cheeks in her hands gently, almost as if she help her to tight she would break like glass. Their lips moved together in almost perfect sync. Regina's hands were digging into Emma's hips, holding her as close as she was willing. When Emma finally worked up the courage, she opened her mouth and ran her tongue across Regina's bottom lip. Regina whimpered out and almost immediately opened her mouth for Emma.

Regina groaned into Emma's mouth, her hands having a mind of their own and traveling their way up Emma's torso until her thumb were just under the swell of her breasts. Reluctantly, Emma pulled back, resting her forehead on Regina's. Both of their breathing was heavy as they soaked in the feeling of being so close to one another.

"We have to stop this," Emma all but gasped out. Regina nodded her head, knowingly, but couldn't force herself to move away from the blonde.

"Tomorrow I am going to end things with Hook," Emma whispered, her thumb brushing over Regina's hot cheekbone. The brunette sighed and shook her head.

"I can't ask you to do that. Not for me." Emma tutted her until she didn't hear another noise come from Regina's mouth.

"I am not doing this just for you. I am doing it for me, and for Hope, and maybe a little bit for you. Hook isn't good for me or my daughter," she admitted, picking her head up and pressing a kiss to Regina's forehead. Regina kept her eyes closed and nodded slightly, not wanting Emma to pick up her lips from her skin.

"I'm sorry," the queen whimpered out, holding onto Emma impossibly tighter. Now that she had her she didn't want to let her go.

"There is nothing to be sorry for, Regina. You did nothing wrong." Emma had only seen Regina get emotional on a handful of occasions, and they all had come about when something horrible was happening to their son. She heard the tremor in Regina's voice, though, and she knew she was close to tears. Emma wrapped her arms around her back and held her close, pressing a kiss to the crown of her head.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. You deserved to know. I'm sorry I am breaking up your marriage too," she mumbled into Emma's neck, but the blonde woman only chuckled and rubbed her back.

"My marriage to that fuckup has been broken for a while, Regina. It is nothing to worry about. Right now let's just focus on getting some sleep so we can talk about this in the morning."

Regina nodded into her neck and pulled away slightly so they could walk over to the bed. When Regina climbed onto her side of the bed Emma smiled at her, and laid down on her own side, the right side, that she had slept on since she was a small child.

They both laide turned towards one another. Regina's hands were tucked under her pillow and her eyes were scanning across Emma's pale face that seemed to glow in the moonlight. Emma reached forward and grabbed one of Regina's hands that were tucked under her pillow and laced their fingers together.

"I think I realized I loved you when we came back from the missing year. I saw you and then everything just clicked. I realized that the memories that you gave me while we were in New York were your own memories and, I don't know, something just clicked. I knew you were the person I wanted, but I knew I couldn't have you. I never thought you would want me like that," Emma explained, playing with Regina's fingers like they were a toy. The brunette sighed and nodded her head.

"I know that feeling all too well," she admitted. "Not knowing if you were wanted in the same way that you want the other person, and when you realize you aren't wanted that way, hell, nothing hurts worse." Emma shivered and brought Regina's hand up to her mouth and kissed along her knuckles.

"I'm sorry you felt that way."

"It's okay. I guess it all worked out in the end, though," Regina teased, inching her body closer to Emma's while she spoke. Emma smiled and ran her free hand over Regina's side and pulled her flush against her body.

"Yes. Yes it did," she whispered before she pressed her lips against Regina's once more.


	6. Chapter 6

"Well you seem awfully chipper this morning," Snow laughed out as she walked into Regina's obnoxiously large office.

Regina knew she was smiling like an idiot. She knew she was acting like a love-sick teenager but she couldn't help it. She was happy. She was happier than she had ever been, and she like the feeling.

The brunette flipped through her papers even though her former step-daughter was standing in front of her now. She racked her brain for a smart, snippy comment, but she came up with nothing.

"I am glad that you can finally see something that is right in front of your face, Snow." She grimaced to herself at the words. They were definitely not her best. The younger woman only smiled and sat down in one of the two chairs that sat comfortably in front of Regina's desk. "Is there any particular reason as to why you are here?"

"Just coming to see how you are faring in your new position." Regina scoffed, setting her pen down, finally looking up at the other woman.

"I am doing just fine, Snow. It isn't like I haven't done this before," she snipped back, adding a glare in to show how annoyed she was with the brunette.

Snow had a look of innocence on her face as she watched the Good Queen try and insult her. She had learned long ago to not take the snippy comments to heart and she was glad of it. She just straightened her posture and smiled at her even wider than before.

"So what did you do last night?" Regina's face paled.

"I didn't do anything. Henry and I had a night in." The younger queen cocked her head to the side.

"Thats funny, I thought he was with us last night playing Monopoly."

"Did I say Henry? I mean Maleficent." Regina let the lie fall from her lips easily, covering her tracks as best as she could.

"I thought she was trying to track down Lily's father again?" Regina's stomach dropped.

_Shit shit shit shit shit, _she thought to herself.

"What is it to you, Snow?" She sounded bored, something she had mastered in the most tense of situations. Snow wasn't grilling her, not like the interrogation she was used to. There was something, though, about sitting in front of her secret lover's mother that put her more on edge than usual.

"Oh, nothing. I was just wondering what you and Emma did last night," she said almost evilly. She had a small smirk on her lips, one that reminded Regina so very much of the blonde that she couldn't get out of her head.

"How do you know she was over last night? Did one of your little birds report back to you? Are you spying on me," she all but shrieked. Snow laughed.

"No, Regina. Calm down-"

"Calm? I am calm. I don't know what you mean by calm down. I am perfectly-"

"Oh, good lord, Regina. I don't care what you two did last night. You two are grown women, it is your own business. I just went to Granny's last night because I wanted a grilled cheese and saw her car." The mother of two had an all but knowing smile on her face, forcing Regina's heart to plummet the little ways that it had to go to be settled firmly in her gut.

"She just came over for a drink and crashed at mine," she gently explained, trying to get the woman off her trail. She only chuckled back.

"Okay, Regina." She stood from the chair. "I am going to talk to my daughter, if you don't mind. It has been a while since we've had some mother-daughter bonding," she said chipperly, before leaving the room quickly.

"Your mother will be the death of me."

"You and me both," the blonde replied from the other room, stretching her long limbs on the neatly made bed.

Regina ran her brush through her hair and watched the blonde from the reflection in her mirror that was hung on the bathroom wall. She rolled her eyes as she watched the woman mess up her once wrinkle-free bed. She made her way into the room.

"Did she come and grill you today, too?" The blonde hummed a yes.

"Does she ever give up a chance to have a peek into our personal lives?" Regina chuckled and sat on the edge of the bed and propped on foot over one bent knee. She reached over to her nightstand and grabbed her trusty bottle of lotion.

The sun outside had long since set, but that didn't stop the work from flowing in for either of the women. Emma had an insane amount of paperwork, which only ended up on Regina's desk by the end of the day. The two women hardly spoke as the day progressed, leaving them both cranky by the time they got home.

"She just doesn't know her boundaries," Emma sighed out, sitting up in the bed and leaning closer to Regina. The brunette continued lathering the lotion into her skin, shivering when she felt Emma gently press her lips to the back of her neck. She hummed, her throat scratchy from yelling at obnoxious secretaries and advisors of the like.

"You would think she would know when to give up," she hummed out, her hands ceasing to move on her thigh. Emma trailed her soft kisses across the back of her neck, stopping and going back up when she got to the curve of her shoulder.

"She is the infamous Snow White. She isn't a quitter, everyone knows that," Emma whispered against her neck. Regina shivered and tilted her to the back, allowing Emma more access to the smooth plane of her neck. There was a tiny voice in the back of Regina's head, though, and she couldn't ignore it any longer.

"Speaking of quitting," Regina trailed off, pushing herself away from her secret lover's body. Emma's heart sunk as she watched Regina stand from the bed and pull her robe tighter around her. "What happened with you and the handless wonder?"

Emma sighed and ran her hand over her face. She fell back onto her ass on the bed and pulled her knees up to her chest.

"Nothing. Nothing important." She tried to sound believable. She tried to convince Regina that nothing had happened between her and her now ex, but the brunette could tell that she was lying.

"But something did happen." She drew out the words, raising a well manicured brow at her partner. Emma's face scrunched up.

"I mean, we talked. He wasn't happy…" she trailed off, looking down at the comforter. She picked at a small thread that had come loose and tried her best not to look up at the prying Queen.

"And how unhappy was he, Emma?"

When the sheriff had gotten home, Regina didn't have a good chance to look at her. She had given her a quick peck to the lips before Emma claimed she had to feed Hope and put the sleepy baby to bed. Regina thought nothing of it, but now she saw how Emma was wearing makeup and her cheek was, if one looked closely enough, swollen. It wasn't unheard of for her to be wearing makeup, but not as heavily as she was now. Fury and hatred rose up in her throat.

"Emma what the hell did Hook do?" She growled, clenching her fists at her side. She could feel icy-hot rage filling her veins and she knew that she was probably steaming. The blonde visibly flinched.

Only a handful of people had seen Emma Swan cry. When she was eight, one of the boys she was in a foster home with made fun of her every time she cried, so she learned to keep the tears at bay. Only people she had trusted had seen her cry. Now she had fat, hot tears running down her cheeks that fell onto the comforter.

"That bastard," Regina hissed, moving quickly and enveloping Emma in a bone crushing hug. Emma cried into her shoulder, her tears soaking through the robe that was barely hanging onto Regina's body. Regina pressed a kiss to the crown of her head and rubbed her back, soothing her in the best way she knew how.

"He… he called me a whore and a homewrecker, Regina," she wailed out, her hands clutching the back of her fluffy robe. Regina's heart beat three times faster and her blood boiled.

_I'll kill that son of a bitch._

_You can't do that, you just earned everyone's trust back. You're a Queen for Christ's sake. _

Against her better judgment, she couldn't help but think of all the ways she could make the pirate suffer. She wanted to hurt him, and if Emma asked, she would do it. She would do anything for her Emma.

"You know that isn't true, Emma. That isn't true at all," she whispered into her hair, pressing a kiss just below her ear. "You know that he was out with other… people. This is not your fault," she promised, but she didn't think Emma believed her.

"I ended things. I am the one who put a stop to our marriage. I told him… I tried to tell him that I met someone else and that he and I had just grown apart. I tried to tell him that nothing would change we would just not be married and living together. We still had Hope." She sobbed out the words, hiccuping in between every other one. Regina suppressed a groan. She knew what Emma was about to tell her. She knew deep down what that slimy pirate did, and she swore she felt fire spark at the tips of her fingers.

"He stood in front of me just as I had put Hope down, so quickly I couldn't react and pushed me against the wall. He wrapped his hand around my throat and got in my face. He… he slapped me," she whimpered out. Regina felt bile rising in her throat. She gulped it down.

A fresh new wave of tears started falling down Emma's cheeks, and Regina held her against her chest. She cooed soft things in her ear, even though she was thinking something completely different.

"What do you want me to do," she said softly. She knew she was treading in dangerous waters. She knew that she would do anything for Emma. If she asked she would give her the sun, the moon, and the stars. She would do anything for her and she didn't know whether that was a good thing or a bad thing.

"Nothing. I don't want you getting involved any more than you have to," she said quickly. Regina sighed but nodded her head.

"I am so sorry, Emma. I am so, so sorry, my love," she whispered into her mess of curls. Curiosity tweaked her mind when her lips brushed against the smooth planes of her neck.

"Let me see you, darling," she whispered, pulling back so she could see Emma's face. Emma whimpered when Regina reached up and cupped her chin. She couldn't tell much, but she could see the bruise under the makeup that Emma had tried to hide it with. When she lifted her head up to look at her neck her jaw locked and a growl ripped through her throat.

On either side of her neck were deep blue and purple bruises where his fingers had squeezed her throat. One bruise on the left and four on the right. All together there were six horrible bruises that would remind Emma of this day for the neck week or two. Regina grimaced.

"I can fix this," she whispered. She picked up her already glowing hand and held it over Emma's neck. The blonde reached up and stopped her though.

"I want to take him to court. I want a restraining order to keep him away from me and Hope. We can't do that without proof. Take pictures," she pushed out. Regina's heart stopped. She didn't want to. She didn't want a reminder of this, for her sake and Emma's.

"Emma, I don't think-"

"Just do it," she said quickly, cutting her off. "Please." She reached over and grabbed her phone off the nightstand and handed it to the shaking brunette. Regina hesitantly took it and slide open the camera app. She tried to not shake, she tried to get the best picture she could, but she was too mad. She took a deep breath to calm herself down, which helped, but she wasn't as calm as she needed to be.

She snapped the pictures quickly and the put the phone back on the nightstand. She grabbed Emma's hands in hers.

"You know what he did is not your fault, Emma. He is crazy and it is best that you got away from him. You did what was right for you and Hope and came home. You are home, Emma." She pressed a kiss to each of her knuckles and the kissed the backs and the palms of her hands.

"Home," Emma whispered. She had her eyes closed, but a few stray tears were falling from her eyes. Regina set Emma's hands down in her lap and wiped the tears away, healing the bruise on her cheek as she went. She healed her neck, and when she was done, kissed her forehead.

"Why don't you let me run you a bath?" She suggested. It took a moment for Emma to respond, and when she did it was only with a simple nod.

Regina helped her up from the bed and led her into the bathroom. She turned on the water and felt it until it was hot enough and watched as it slowly filled up the tub. She helped Emma change from her clothes, the movements slow and calculated. She tried to keep her mind on one track, which was making Emma feel better, but she couldn't help the shiver that wracked through her body everytime more of Emma's skin was revealed.

Emma slowly lowered herself down into the tub and sighed out when the water brushed just over her shoulders. He blonde hair laid on top of the water like a curtain, shielding her from any prying eyes.

Regina sat on the rim of the tub and watched her partner closely. Emma's eyes were closed and she could tell that her chest was moving up and down slowly underneath the water. She sighed a long and breathy sigh.

"You know you can tell me anything, right?" Her voice was barely above a squeak and a part of her wanted to hate herself for it, but she just let it go for the time being. Emma nodded her head slowly.

"I know," she whispered, "I know. But there are some things that I just don't want to think about so I could pretend that they never did happen. Like him, for instance. It makes me feel like I am that small little girl again, getting pushed to the back of the line when waiting for dinner to be served." She had never shared her stories from foster care with anyone. No one had cared to ask so she stopped telling.

The thought of Emma ever being mistreated or going hungry or getting bullied by other people, though, made her want to vomit and curse all of the offenders into an eternal Hell. She knew she couldn't do that, though, because Emma didn't want her to.

"I don't tell a lot of people about the things in my life. You know that. I don't think Hook even remembered to ask on a good night. He liked to avoid the past as much as I did," she mumbled, cutting Regina's sentence off before it had even began.

It was like she was on a river. She was sitting in a boat, one big enough to fit just her, and the current was steady. Steady until Emma mentioned Hook and the rapids would appear out of nowhere and push her down an unwanted path. Steady until Emma would tell her something that made her blood boil and the rapids would pick up again, throwing her from side to side.

"I know this may sound selfish but I want to know every single detail about your life before you came here," she finally said, her voice sounding more confident now. Emma opened her eyes and stared at the woman she loved so deeply, so wholly. She reached out from under the water and laced her fingers with Regina's, holding them there as if her life depended on it.

That night Emma slept soundly in Regina's arms, no more tears falling from her dry eyes. She knew in the morning her eyes would be puffy and her face would be red because that was what happened every time she cried before falling asleep.

But this time she had someone to wipe away her fallen tears and soothe her splotchy face. She had Regina, and that was enough.


End file.
